HMS GANGES
ASSOCIATION
Noticeboard
|
HMS GANGES |
|
Missing Royal Navy Life?
Here's how to recapture the atmosphere of the good old days
and simulate living onboard ship once more!
1. Build a shelf in the top of your wardrobe and sleep on it inside a small sleeping bag.
2. Remove the wardrobe door and replace it with a curtain that's too small.
3. Wash your underwear every night in a bucket,then hang it over the water pipes to dry.
4. Four hours after you go to bed,have your wife whip open the curtain,shine a torch in your eyes and say, "sorry mate"
5. Renovate your bathroom. Build a wall across the centre of your bath and move the showerhead to chest level.Store beer barrels in the shower enclosure.
6. When you shower, remember to shout at the top of your voice"turning on" (when switching water on) and "turning off"when off.
7. Every time there is a thunderstorm, sit in a wobbly rocking chair and rock as hard as you can until you are sick.
8. Put oil instead of water into humidifier and then set it to high.
9. Don't watch TV,except for movies in the middle of the night. For added realism,have your family vote for which movie they want to see, then select a different one.
10. (Mandatory for engineers) Leave a lawnmower running in your living room 24 hours a day to re-create the proper noise levels.
11. Have the paper boy cut your hair.
12. Once-a-week blow compressed air up through your chimney.Ensure that the wind carries the soot over on to your neighbours house. When he complains, laugh at him.
13. Buy a rubbish compactor, and use it once per week. Store up your rubbish in the other side of your bath.
14. Wake up every night at midnight, and make a sandwich out of anything you can find, preferably using stale bread. Optional: cold soup or ravioli out of a can.
15. Devise menus for your family a week in advance without looking in the larder or fridge
16. Set your alarm clock to go off at random times through the night, when it goes off, leap out of bed, get dressed as fast as you can, and then run into the garden and break out the garden hose.
17. Once a month, take every major household appliance completely apart, then re-assemble.
18. Use four spoons of coffee per cup, and allow it to sit for three hours before drinking
19. Invite about 85 people, who you dont like to come and stay for a month.
20. Install a small fluorescent light under your coffee table, then lie underneath it to read books.
21. Raise the threshold and lower the top sills of all the doors in your house. Now you will always either hit your head, or skin your shins when passing through them.
22. When baking cakes, prop up one side of the tin whilst it is in the oven. When it has cooled spread icing really thickly on one side to even it out again.
23. Every so often throw your cat in the bath, and shout "man overboard", then run into the kitchen,and sweep all the dishes and pans onto the floor whilst yelling at your wife for not having secured for sea.
24. Put on the headphones of your stereo, do not plug them in. Go and stand in front of the dishwasher. Say to nobody in particular "dishwasher manned and ready sir". Stand there for three or four hours. Say once again, to nobody in particular, "dishwasher secured". Remove the headphones, roll up the cord and put them away.
25. Nickname your favourite shoes 'steamies', and then get your children to hide them around the house on a random basis.
26. Go out with a girl who has got touretes syndrome, just to hear someone scream and shout at you for no apparent reason.
27. Go to the supermarket and buy nothing, but queue up anyway.
Centenary Parade Overview
Saturday, 23 April, 2005
The Parade by former HMS Ganges boy trainees, instructors, officers and ship’s company (approximately 1,000 participants) will take place in the Dock Area of Ipswich on St George’s Day, 23 April, 2005. In addition, members of the RNA, RBL, RHS Holbrook and local cadet organisations will be participating as well as serving members of the Royal Navy, Royal Marines, Army and Air Force.
The event is being organised in conjunction with Ipswich Borough Council, which had awarded HMS Ganges the Freedom of the Borough in 1971, and which is simultaneously holding its annual SpringFest as a complement to the Parade. This will, of course, provide an extra attraction for visitors to the area.
The detailed planning of the Parade, with which the Association is concerned, depends upon a number of variables which have yet to be finally confirmed. Accordingly, everything described below is subject to amendment or change. However, it is right that members be made aware of the overall concept, and, more importantly, to contact former members or existing members to ensure the widest possible publicity is given to this prestigious event. We have to accept that we will not be organising another such event in our lifetimes.
The Parade:
It is envisaged that the majority of participants will be attending the Reunion at Pakefield, Lowestoft and will therefore need to be bussed down to Ipswich at about 0930 that morning, arriving between 1030 & 1100. Those participating locally (“the day trippers”) will be able to join up with the Pakefield contingent as the column forms up adjacent to Stoke Bridge/Albion Wharves. The march itself should commence at about 1200. However, this start time depends upon the VIP’s availability and may be changed with consequent alterations to the transport arrangements.
The Saluting Base will be situated in front of the Custom House, an imposing Georgian building situated on the refurbished dockside facing the Wet Dock. Former Captains of HMS Ganges will be in attendance. Taking the salute will be the Second Sea Lord, Vice-Admiral Sir James Burnell Nugent who will be accompanied by the Mayor of Ipswich. In addition, many civic dignitaries from both Ipswich and the surrounding area will be formally invited to attend.
The overall aim is for the Parade, led by a Royal Marine Band until it reaches the Custom House, to march the length of the quayside to an open area at Orwell Quay where one or more marquees will be sited for the purpose of providing refreshments to participants and a guest on completion.
Broadly speaking it is anticipated that the Parade will take the form of a column led by the oldest members first. Special provision will be made for disabled marchers either by providing wheelchair-pushers or allowing them to parade past the Saluting Base only. WW2 Veterans may be grouped as one unit as the occasion also commemorates the 60 th anniversary of the end of the war.
The column, it is envisaged, will be separated into years (in roughly the same way we organised the 20 th anniversary parade in 1996). Standards from the Association, Divisions and other organisations will be paraded. Marchers will take approximately 15 minutes from the marshalling point to arrive at the marquees. It is all on level ground. Those unfamiliar with the area may not appreciate that the Dock Area has been extensively refurbished and was opened by HM the Queen in 2002. There will be room for spectators to stand along the whole length of the quay, on the seaward side.
Before the march itself commences there will be a fly-past by helicopters of 4 Army Air Corps (current holders of the Freedom of the Borough of Ipswich) and the RAF Air Sea Rescue unit. A guard from the Army will be formed up in front of the Customs House as well as, hopefully, a contingent from the Royal Navy.
In anticipation that there will be something like one visitor for each participant our contribution to the population of the area that day will be in the region of 3,000. However, extensive advertising will be provided by Ipswich, of both their Springfest and our Parade, and this will include radio and, possibly, TV coverage. This is likely to result in the above figure being doubled to 6,000 or even more. Music to entertain the crowd will be provided by Ipswich both before the parade and afterwards. Boat trips around the harbour and the River Orwell are also being organised by Ipswich.
RHS Holbrook will be providing their own band which will lead the youth section of the parade.
On completion of the march itself it is expected that the marchers will be assembled on Orwell Quay where a speech will be delivered by the Second Sea Lord from the bridge of HMS Shoreham, which will be visiting over that weekend. Afterwards, everyone will repair to the marquees for buffet-type refreshments and where a cash-bar will also be provided. It is anticipated that this aspect will conclude at about 1400-1430. Thereafter, buses will have been organised for the return trip to Pakefield
It is not known at this stage whether any special arrangements are to be provided for VIP Guests at Pakefield eg an invitation to dinner. It is hoped that the Royal Marines will provide a unit for the ceremony of Mess Beating in the main ballroom.
We have to emphasise, once again, that each and every element of the occasion has to be confirmed by those involved and is of course subject to any operational requirements or security alerts arising. Accordingly this Outline could change radically if, for example, some units can no longer participate for whatever reason. The 2005 Sub-Committee will keep the membership informed as things develop, using the website wherever possible and asking the Editor to print the latest information available in the Spring Gazette. Updates will also be emailed or mailed to Divisional Representatives.
Des Kerrigan, <dkerrigan@railex.co.uk>
2005 Sub-Committee Chairman
25 Jan 05
Its back
its better
and
its
bigger
Come and see the world renowned Shep Woolley accompanied by the ever popular Band of Two. This auspicious event is taking place in the palatial surroundings of Uxbridge RNA. West London Division invites you to join them Saturday the 12 th of February 2005. Ticket are very reasonably priced at £7 each, the beer is even more reasonably priced including all the popular tipples plus a selection of real ales, house doubles and for the more exotic bottled cocktails. The venue is situated within easy reach of underground station (Hillingdon), the M25/M40 and we have reasonably priced hotels within minutes walking distance. This event sells out before Christmas every year so to avoid disappointment please apply early.
For more information contact Mike Wild f.boy@btinternet.com we guarantee an excellent night out .
 |
DEVONPORT DIVISION REUNION COACH |
